IT’S MY BIRTHDAY! OVER 50 BUT NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BEING OVER THE HILL
Today is my 51st birthday, and since I’m back to blogging I thought it would be fun to reflect on life since my last birthday post written six years ago. One of the things I love about blogging is it serves as part journal, part diary for me and sparks a dialogue with readers. In 2017, I started a personal blog after a traumatic year when I lost a business I had loved with all of my heart for nearly 14 years. I found the writing process to be cathartic as I healed myself and embarked on the reinvention journey for the next chapter of life. That year, I turned 45, so I wrote about what that meant to me. I’m including the link to that blog excerpt at the end of this post, so if you feel inclined, you can read my thought process then, compared to now.
At 45, I was contemplating who Maya 2.0 was going to be after prominently being know as “queen of the bride’s” (not a descriptor I coined, but was given to me) for over a decade. At 51, I feel like I’m working towards Maya 5.0! Professionally, I’ve been all over the place. In the last six years I obtained my real estate license and was a short-lived agent. I wrote and self-published a book, I served as the CEO of a franchise concept that was never to be, and I founded an e-commerce startup, that’s remained in startup status for the last three years. I also launched a side gig with my husband that offers college preparation and highlight reel production for high school student athletes, and now I’ve immersed myself in this exciting new venture with one of my dearest friends, Penny.
Me & Penny cheesin’ for the camera at a holiday party six years ago
In case you couldn’t tell, I’m an entrepreneur, which means I’m slightly crazy, overly optimistic, an epic dreamer, a risk taker, a thriver in ambiguity and someone who comfortably adapts to living high-off-the-hog or as a popper. Entrepreneurship is not easy and I’m sure has contributed to many of my gray hairs, wrinkles and health ailments brought on by stress, but I’d much rather try and fail with passion and conviction than work for someone else. So, one constant over many decades that’s still sharply in tact is my entrepreneurial fire!
On a personal level, I moved twice in six years, and am currently writing this post from what I’m hoping is the forever home for me and my husband. We raised our two youngest kiddos from middle schoolers to high school graduates, joining the ‘empty nesters club’ this year. We took epic vacations including memorable jaunts to Hawaii, Vancouver, BC and cruising to ports in Columbia, Panama, Bahamas, Jamaica and Costa Rica. Most of the last six years was spent on soccer and lacrosse fields cheering on our children and nearly every weekend included a trip to a soccer tournament. Really, the last six years was all about the kids and raising them to young adulthood.
As I reflect, I’m feeling so grateful for the mostly joyous, fulfilling and adventurous ride the last six years provided. I’m immeasurably thankful for the minimal heartache these years brought. Unfortunately, I lost my crazy, yet precious chihuahua Bella, and the most profound loss was the passing of my father-in-law last year, the day before my 50th birthday. he was a great man and we miss his presence everyday.
The obligatory birthday selfie
It’s not lost on me that as I get older, so are some of the most important people in my life including my parents, my in-laws and many folks who’ve had an enormous influence in my life. While I’ve been able to evade an onslaught of loss, I know at any moment that could all change. I certainly don’t want to be a Debbie-downer on my birthday, but acknowledging this point in my life provides perspective in determining my priorities. Now that the kiddos are out of the house my time is more mine than it has been in 18 years. This means I get to be even more intentional about how I spend that time. If I look ahead, I want nothing more than to allocate a huge amount of that time to my nearest and dearest. This means, visiting my children at their respective colleges as much as we possibly can. It means taking more trips to visit the parent-figures in my life who are scattered up and down the eastern seaboard and allocating time to the many other family members and loved ones who hold a special place in my heart.
I want to explore this gorgeous world with my husband and kids, and nurture my friendships better. I hope to make more space for the important people in my life whether it’s someone I see daily or someone I haven’t seen for years. I do believe I’m at the perfect time in my life to water those friendships that have wilted for one reason or another. I guess what I’m saying is I want to live bigger than I ever have and I want to connect with my people on a deeper level - to recognize how quickly time passes us and to make grand memories from the simplest of moments.
Trust the timing of your life
At 51, I’m the most comfortable in my skin than I’ve ever been. I’m more of a homebody than a social butterfly and I absolutely love it. I prefer intimate social settings over large gatherings. I’m at peace with all of my life choices. I used to need to be accepted by everyone and was “friends” with anyone. Now, I could care less if you accept me and I’m incredibly fulfilled with the small circle of friends that enrich my life on a daily basis. I no longer move at a frenetic pace, nor are climbing any ladders (literally and figuratively) - I’m done with the rat race. However, I’m no couch potato. I get up early and am moving and shaking from the moment I get out of bed until I get back into it for a night of sleep. I still and always will unapologetically live life on my terms. I will stick up, speak up and show up for myself, my people and my beliefs, and I will love you and accept you if you’re a good person with a good heart no matter how you live, who you love and who you choose to be in this crazy world.
I’m not going to expound any profound life lessons, but I will share my mantra, which I feel so deeply that I had it tattooed on my forearm this year, and it’s simply, “trust the timing of your life.” I rarely question why things happen or how they happen because I know it’s all part of some bigger purpose. I believe in God, so for me, I equate it to His plan.
Today, I’m just so thankful that I still have a life to trust! This life of mine is the best gift of all. Happy Birthday to me! Let me know where you’re at in the current season of your life in the comments below.
~Maya
(PS - I no longer post on my personal blog, but here’s my 45, Fierce, and On Fire birthday post from 2017. Enjoy!)
